Jesus. Obviously.
However, seeing as Jesus is obvious, I’ll tell you about my second favourite.
Ehud.
You can read about him in Judges 3:12-30.
I love Ehud for a number of reasons, but mainly because he’s like an action hero. He is a tricky left-handed man who liberates his country when things are going badly. Israel is being ruled over by a fat, foreign king. Ehud, while paying tribute to the king, uses the opportunity to get the king alone with the promise of secrets, and then stab the king in his fat belly. The king, responds to this extreme invasion of his personal space by simultaneously dying and pooing himself. Ehud locks the king’s doors and then escapes through the porch. The kings servants can smell the poo and think the king is just dropping a big one, giving Ehud time to escape before his assassination is discovered. Ehud then leads an army to free Israel from their foreign oppressors.
It’s a great story made up of two of my favourite things in stories, action and poo jokes. That is why Ehud is my favourite character.
If you’re interested in hearing me preach on Ehud, you can go to this post from my preaching blog and you’ll be able to hear it all (the link to the audio is at the bottom). There are many juvenile jokes in that sermon, plus you can see why Ehud is pretty much Jesus.
This is post is part of the Blogging by Request series. To make your suggestion of what I should blog about, go here.
Wouldn’t Jesus have something (stern) to say about stabbing people in the belly and making them poo and die? Especially people who are too fat to get away.
Yeah, that he might.
Generally the book of Judges is seen as a spiral into depravity. It’s a little hard to figure out where Ehud fits on that spiral. But chances are Jesus would have some things to say.
Still, there’s not denying it, poo is funny.